How to Handle Conflict

My dear brothers and sisters, be quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to get angry.

James 1:19 (NLT)

I’ll tell you how to deal with conflict quickly, but you’re not going to like it. The solution to conflict resolution is one word: confrontation.

If you’re going to resolve conflict, you must confront. But, you don’t have to confront in anger. In fact, you should try not to confront in anger. Lovingly go to the person and, then speaking the truth in love, deal with the problem immediately.

Very few of us enjoy confrontation. The only people who really do are troublemakers who seem to delight in confrontation. They love to go to people and say, “You’re blowing it!” That’s their thrill.

Because it’s risky and uncomfortable, most people don’t like confrontation, but it’s the only way to resolve conflict.

What’s the best way to confront? James 1:19 teaches three rules for confrontation. Everyone should be:

· Quick to listen,

· Slow to speak, and

· Slow to become angry.

If you’re quick to listen and if you’re slow to speak, you’ll automatically be slow to anger.

What are you listening for? You are listening for the hurt in that person. Hurting people always hurt other people. When someone is being a jerk, more than likely it’s because that person is hurting. When you understand their hurt a bit, you have a better understanding of why they do what they do, and you’re a little more patient with them.

Understanding always brings patience. When we don’t understand things, we’re impatient. When we understand them, we’re much more patient...Rick Warren

How to Get Past Regrets

Forget about what’s happened; don’t keep going over old history. Be alert, be present. I’m about to do something brand-new. It’s bursting out! Don’t you see it? There it is! I’m making a road through the desert, rivers in the badlands.

Isaiah 43:18-19 (MSG)

How often do you play the “If only” game?

· If only I could do it over again.

· If only I had listened sooner.

· If only I could erase the past.

· If only I could forgive myself.

The thing to remember is that no one is perfect. We all have regrets; we’ve all made bad choices, and said foolish things; we’ve all wasted time, and hurt ourselves and others.

How do you release your regrets? In my experience as a pastor, I’ve seen several strategies we tend to use that simply do not work:

· You try to bury your past. But burying the past will never help you get past your regrets. You can try to minimize (“It wasn’t a big deal”), rationalize (“Everyone does it”), and compromise (lowering standards), but your regrets are still there, and if unresolved, they’ll keep coming back to haunt you over and over again like a creature in a horror movie.

· We blame others. This tactic is as old as Adam and Eve. When Adam sinned, he took it like a man: he blamed his wife!We use blame to balance out our guilt.

· We beat up on ourselves. We try to pay for our guilt unconsciously through illness, depression, setting ourselves up for failure, and other forms of self-punishment. The problem with beating up on yourself is this: your conscience never knows when to stop!Some people spend their entire lives in self-condemnation.

What does God want you to do with your regrets?

· Admit your guilt. Own up to it.Don’t make excuses. “A man who refuses to admit his mistakes can never be successful.But if he confesses and forsakes them, he gets another chance”(Proverbs 28:13 LB).

· Accept Christ’s forgiveness. He’s waiting to clean your slate.Ask him to clear your conscience. “There is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus” (Romans 8:1 NIV).

· Forgive yourself and focus on the future. “Forget about what’s happened; don’t keep going over old history. Be alert, be present. I’m about to do something brand-new. It’s bursting out! Don’t you see it? There it is! I’m making a road through the desert, rivers in the badlands” (Isaiah 43:18-19 MSG)....Rick Warren

How to Balance Your Schedule

So be careful how you live, not as fools but as those who are wise. Make the most of every opportunity for doing good in these evil days. Don’t act thoughtlessly, but try to understand what the Lord wants you to do.

Ephesians 5:15-17 (NLT)

We all have the same amount of time – 168 hours a week. The only question is, “How am I investing it?” We want to learn to invest it wisely so that we won’t be like the man in Isaiah 49:4, who said, “I have used up my strength but have accomplished nothing” (GNT).

Ephesians 5:15-17 offers three steps to understanding how to manage your time better:

1. Analyze my lifestyle. “So pay close attention to how you live. Don’t live like ignorant people, but like wise people” (Ephesians 5:15 GNT). Be aware of time robbers. Don’t say, “I wonder where all my time went!” Carefully evaluate your schedule and seriously consider how you live.

In order to save time, you must first know how you lose it. Sit down and make a time log: “How did I spend last week?” Or, over the next seven days, keep a record of how you spend your hours. Where does your time go? Just by keeping a record, you’ll use your time better.

2. Utilize the present. “Make the most of every chance you get” (Ephesians 5:16 MSG). The best time to manage your time is right now – not tomorrow, not next week, not next year. Now!

Proverbs 27:1 says, “Never boast about tomorrow. You don’t know what will happen between now and then” (GNT).

How do you make the most of the present?

· Do it now. If you had a bank account and I were to tell you that every morning someone was going to put in $86,400 into that bank account – that you could spend it any way you wanted to, but at the end of that day, whatever money you hadn’t spent from the account would be lost – do you think you’d try to spend it? Or do you think you’d let it go to waste? Guess what? You have 86,400 seconds every day! Utilize the present by doing it now.

· Eliminate time wasters. “I may do anything, but everything is not useful . . . [or] constructive” (1 Corinthians 10:23 PH). The apostle Paul is saying that many things in life are not necessarily wrong, but they’re also not necessary. You’ve got to eliminate the time wasters. It’s amazing how creative we get when we have a job to do that we don’t want to do.

3. Prioritize what’s important. “Don’t act thoughtlessly but try to understand what the Lord wants you to do” (Ephesians 5:17 NLT). When you talk about time management, you’ve got to do what God wants you to do. You have just enough time to do God’s will. If you do not have enough time right now, it means one of several things is going on:

· You’re doing something God never intended for you to do.

· You’re not doing what God intended you to do.

· You’re doing the right thing in the wrong way.

God would not give you a purpose in life and then not give you the time to do it. So if you don’t have enough time to do everything you need to do, it means God didn’t expect you to do it all....Rick Warren

How to Deal with Your Anger

If you become angry, do not let your anger lead you into sin, and do not stay angry all day. Don’t give the Devil a chance.

Ephesians 4:26-27 (GNT)

Conflict happens. There’s no avoiding it, and so there’s no avoiding anger in your life.

In fact, ignoring or denying your anger will simply make things worse. When conflict comes up, deal with it head on and quickly. Don’t let it fester. It’s a big mistake to think, “Let’s ignore it and hope it will go away.”

The Bible teaches, in Ephesians 4:26-27 (GNT), “If you become angry, do not let your anger lead you into sin, and do not stay angry all day. Don't give the Devil a chance.”

Some people are surprised by this verse; they ask, “Is it ever right for a Christian to get angry?” Yes.

How do I know it’s all right for a Christian to get angry? Well, let me ask you this: Did Jesus ever get angry? Yes!

Did Jesus ever sin? No. Evidently there are times when anger is appropriate.

In Ephesians, we’re told, “If you become angry, do not let your anger lead you into sin.” This implies there is an anger that leads you into sin, but there’s also an anger that doesn’t lead you into sin. There’s a right way to get angry and there’s a wrong way to get angry.

How do you know the difference?

The wrong kind of anger is anger that is not resolved quickly. It’s becoming angry, and then just staying angry all day and then the next day and the next. The Phillips translation of this Ephesians verse says, “Never go to bed angry.”

That will keep a few of us up sometimes! If you said, “In our marriage, we’ll never go to bed angry,” you might resolve problems a little more quickly.

Anger that is not dealt with turns into resentment and then into bitterness. Bitterness is always sin. Resentment is always sin. Those emotions are always wrong.

The Bible says to deal with anger quickly. Don’t let it hang on. Resolve conflict as quickly as possible...Rick Warren

How to Determine What Matters Most

There are three things that will endure – faith, hope, and love – and the greatest of these is love.

1 Corinthians 13:13 (NLT)

The most important lesson God wants you to learn on earth is how to love. Here are three simple truths about love:

1. Life without love is really worthless. We often act as if relationships are something to be squeezed into our schedule. We talk about finding time for our children or making time for people in our lives. That gives the impression that relationships are just a part of our lives along with many other tasks. But God says relationships are what life is all about.

Jesus summarized what matters most to God in two statements: love God and love people. He said, “You must love the Lord your God with all your heart. . . . This is the first and greatest commandment. A second is equally important: Love your neighbor as yourself. All the other commandments and all the demands of the prophets are based on these two commandments” (Matthew 22:37-40 NLT).

The point of life is learning to love God and people. Life minus love equals zero.

2. Love will last forever. Another reason God tells us to make love our top priority is that it is eternal: “These three things continue forever: faith, hope, and love. And the greatest of these is love” (1 Corinthians 13:13 NCV).

Love leaves a legacy. Mother Teresa said, “It’s not what you do, but how much love you put into it that matters.” Love is the secret of a lasting heritage. In our final moments, we all realize that relationships are what life is all about. Wisdom is learning that truth sooner rather than later.

3. We will be evaluated on our love. One way God measures spiritual maturity is by the quality of your relationships. In heaven God won’t say, “Tell me about your career, your bank account, and your hobbies.” Instead he will review how you treated other people, particularly those in need.

Jesus said the way to love him is to love his family and care for their practical needs: “Truly I tell you, just as you did it to one of the least of these who are members of my family, you did it to me” (Matthew 25:40 NRSV).

People need to understand that when you transfer into eternity, you will leave everything else behind. All you’re taking with you is your character. That’s why the Bible says, “The only thing that counts is faith expressing itself through love” (Galatians 5:6 NIV).

Knowing this, I encourage you to pray this simple prayer every morning: “God, whether I get anything else done today, I want to make sure that I spend time loving you and loving other people – because that’s what life is all about. I don’t want to waste this day.”....Rick Warren

Servants Maintain a Low Profile

And all of you must put on the apron of humility, to serve one another; for the scripture says, “God resists the proud, but shows favor to the humble.”

1 Peter 5:5 (TEV)

Real servants maintain a low profile. Servants don’t promote or call attention to themselves. Instead of acting to impress and dressing for success, they “put on the apron of humility, to serve one another” (1 Peter 5:5 TEV).

If recognized for their service, they humbly accept it but don’t allow notoriety to distract them from their work. Paul exposed a kind of service that appears to be spiritual but is really just a put-on, a show, an act to get attention. He called it “eyeservice,” serving in order to impress people with how spiritual we are (Ephesians 6:6 KJV; Colossians 3:22 KJV).

This was a sin of the Pharisees. They turned helping others, giving, and even prayer into a performance for others. Jesus hated this attitude and warned, “When you do good deeds, don’t try to show off. If you do, you won’t get a reward from your Father in heaven” (Matthew 6:1 CEV).

Self-promotion and servanthood don’t mix. Real servants don’t serve for the approval or applause of others. They live for an audience of One. As Paul said, “If I were still trying to please men, I would not be a servant of Christ” (Galatians 1:10 NIV).

You won’t find many real servants in the limelight; in fact, they avoid it whenever possible. They are content with quietly serving in the shadows.

Joseph is a great example. He didn’t draw attention to himself, but quietly served Potiphar, then his jailer, then Pharaoh’s baker and wine taster, and God blessed that attitude. When Pharaoh promoted him to prominence, Joseph still maintained a servant’s heart, even with his brothers, who had betrayed him.

Unfortunately, many leaders today start off as servants but end up as celebrities. They become addicted to attention, unaware that always being in the spotlight blinds you.

You may be serving in obscurity in some small place, feeling unknown and unappreciated. Listen: God put you where you are for a purpose! He has every hair on your head numbered, and he knows your address....Rick Warren

Servants Finish Their Tasks

“Well done, my good and faithful servant. You have been faithful in handling this small amount, so now I will give you many more responsibilities. Let’s celebrate together!”

Matthew 25:23 (NLT)

Real servants are faithful to their ministry. Servants finish their tasks, fulfill their responsibilities, keep their promises, and complete their commitments. They don’t leave a job half undone, and they don’t quit when they get discouraged. They are trustworthy and dependable.

Faithfulness has always been a rare quality (Psalm 12:1; Proverbs 20:6; Philippians 2:19–22).

Most people don’t know the meaning of commitment. They make commitments casually, then break them for the slightest reason without any hesitation, remorse, or regret. Every week, churches and other organizations must improvise because volunteers didn’t prepare, didn’t show up, or didn’t even call to say they weren’t coming.

Can you be counted on by others? Are there promises you need to keep, vows you need to fulfill, or commitments you need to honor?

This is a test. God is testing your faithfulness. If you pass the test, you’re in good company: Abraham, Moses, Samuel, David, Daniel, Timothy, and Paul were all called faithful servants of God.

Even better, God has promised to reward your faithfulness in eternity. Imagine what it will feel like one day to have God say to you, “Well done, my good and faithful servant. You have been faithful in handling this small amount, so now I will give you many more responsibilities. Let’s celebrate together!” (Matthew 25:23 NLT).

By the way, faithful servants never retire. They serve faithfully as long as they’re alive. You can retire from your career, but you will never retire from serving God....Rick Warren

Servants Do Every Task with Equal Dedication

“Unless you are faithful in small matters, you won’t be faithful in large ones. If you cheat even a little, you won’t be honest with greater responsibilities.”

Luke 16:10 (NLT)

Servants do every task with equal dedication. Whatever they do, servants “do it with all their heart” (Colossians 3:23 NIV).

The size of the task is irrelevant. The only issue is, does it need to be done?

You will never arrive at the state in life where you’re too important to help with menial tasks. God will never exempt you from the mundane. It’s a vital part of your character curriculum. The Bible says, “If you think you are too important to help someone in need, you are only fooling yourself. You are really a nobody” (Galatians 6:3 NLT).

It is in these small services that we grow like Christ.

Jesus specialized in menial tasks that everyone else tried to avoid: washing feet, helping children, fixing breakfast, and serving lepers. Nothing was beneath him, because he came to serve. It wasn’t in spite of his greatness that he did these things, but because of it, and he expects us to follow his example (John 13:15).

Small tasks often show a big heart. Your servant’s heart is revealed in little acts that others don’t think of doing, as when Paul gathered brushwood for a fire to warm everyone after a shipwreck (Acts 28:3).

He was just as exhausted as everyone else, but he did what everyone needed. No task is beneath you when you have a servant’s heart.

Great opportunities often disguise themselves in small tasks. The little things in life determine the big things. Don’t look for great tasks to do for God. Just do the not-so-great stuff, and God will assign you whatever he wants you to do.

There will always be more people willing to do “great” things for God than there are people willing to do the little things. The race to be a leader is crowded, but the field is wide open for those willing to be servants.

Sometimes you serve upward to those in authority, and sometimes you serve downward to those in need. Either way, you develop a servant’s heart when you’re willing to do anything needed....Rick Warren

Real Servants Pay Attention

Never tell your neighbors to wait until tomorrow if you can help them now.

Proverbs 3:28 (TEV)

Real servants pay attention to needs. Servants are always on the lookout for ways to help others. When they see a need, they seize the moment to meet it, just as the Bible commands us: “Whenever we have the opportunity, we have to do what is good for everyone, especially for the family of believers” (Galatians 6:10 GWT).

When God puts someone in need right in front of you, he is giving you the opportunity to grow in servanthood. Notice that God says the needs of your church family are to be given preference, not put at the bottom of your “things to do” list.

We miss many occasions for serving because we lack sensitivity and spontaneity. Great opportunities to serve never last long. They pass quickly, sometimes never to return again. You may only get one chance to serve that person, so take advantage of the moment.

“Never tell your neighbors to wait until tomorrow if you can help them now” (Proverbs 3:28 TEV).

John Wesley was an incredible servant of God. His motto was:

“Do all the good you can, by all the means you can, in all the ways you can, in all the places you can, at all the times you can, to all the people you can, as long as you ever can.”

That is greatness. You can begin by looking for small tasks that no one else wants to do. Do these little things as if they were great things, because God is watching...Rick Warren

We Serve God by Serving Others

Whoever wants to be great must become a servant.

Mark 10:43 (MSG)

We serve God by serving others.

The world defines greatness in terms of power, possessions, prestige, and position. If you can demand service from others, you’ve arrived. In our self-serving culture with its me-first mentality, acting like a servant is not a popular concept.

Jesus, however, measured greatness in terms of service, not status. God determines your greatness by how many people you serve, not how many people serve you.

This is so contrary to the world’s idea of greatness that we have a hard time understanding it, much less practicing it. The disciples argued about who deserved the most prominent position, and 2,000 years later, Christian leaders still jockey for position and prominence in churches, denominations, and parachurch ministries.

Thousands of books have been written on leadership, but few on servanthood. Everyone wants to lead; no one wants to be a servant. We would rather be generals than privates. Even Christians want to be “servant-leaders,” not just plain servants. But to be like Jesus is to be a servant. That’s what he called himself.

While knowing your shape is important for serving God, having the heart of a servant is even more important. Remember, God shaped you for service, not for self-centeredness. Without a servant’s heart, you will be tempted to misuse your shape for personal gain. You will also be tempted to use it as an excuse to exempt yourself from meeting some needs.

God often tests our hearts by asking us to serve in ways we’re not shaped. If you see a man fall into a ditch, God expects you to help him out, not say, “I don’t have the gift of mercy or service.”

While you may not be gifted a particular task, you may be called to do it if no one who is gifted at it is around. Your primary ministry should be in the area of your shape, but your secondary service is wherever you’re needed at the moment.

Your shape reveals your ministry, but your servant’s heart will reveal your maturity. No special talent or gift is required to stay after a meeting to pick up trash or stack chairs. Anyone can be a servant. All it requires is character.

It is possible to serve in church for a lifetime without ever being a servant. You must have a servant’s heart.

How can you know if you have the heart of a servant?

Jesus said, “You can tell what they are by what they do” (Matthew 7:16 CEV)....Rick Warren

How Do You Develop Self-Control ??

God does not give us a spirit of fear, but a spirit of power, love and self-control.

2 Timothy 1:7 (NLT)

Successful people have one obvious trait in common: personal discipline. They are willing to do things that average people are unwilling to do.

It’s my observation that successful people express their self-discipline in six ways:

· Successful people master their moods. They live by their commitments, not their emotions. They do the right thing, even when they don’t feel like it. “A person without self-control is as defenseless as a city with broken-down walls” (Proverbs 25:28 NLT).

· Successful people watch their words. They put their minds in gear before opening their mouths: “Those who control their tongue will have a long life . . .” (Proverbs 13:3 NLT).

· Successful people restrain their reactions. How much can you take before you lose your cool? “People with good sense restrain their anger; they earn esteem by overlooking wrongs” (Proverbs 19:11 NLT).

· Successful people stick to their schedule. If you don’t determine how you will spend your time, you can be sure that others will decide for you! “So be careful how you live, not as fools but as those who are wise. Make the most of every opportunity for doing good in these evil days” (Ephesians 5:15-16 NLT).

· Successful people manage their money. They learn to live on less than what they make, and they invest the difference. The value of a budget is that it tells your money where you want it to go rather than wondering where it went: “The wise have wealth and luxury, but fools spend whatever they get” (Proverbs 21:20 NLT).

· Successful people maintain their health. That way they can accomplish more and enjoy their achievements: “Control your body and live in holiness . . .” (1 Thessalonians 4:4 NLT).

Now, where do you need to develop self-control?

The disciplines you establish today will determine your success tomorrow. But it takes more than just willpower for lasting self-control. It takes a power greater than yourself. Think about this promise from the Bible: “For God has not given us a spirit of fear and timidity, but of power, love, and self-discipline (2 Timothy 1:7 NLT).

The more I accept God’s control over my life, the more self-control he gives me!!!! Rick Warren

When a Friend Betrays

All my enemies whisper together against me; they imagine the worst for me . . . Even my close friend, whom I trusted, he who shared my bread, has lifted up his heel against me.

Psalm 41: 7, 9 (NIV)

Years ago my friend Chris was betrayed by a very close friend. Chris spent over two years mentoring this man, and trusted him so much that the protégé even managed all of Chris’s finances.

Then, one night, the protégé inexplicitly left a banquet being held in Chris’s honor, and he laid a trap which led to Chris being arrested on false charges. As Chris was arrested, the protégé leaned close and kissed him on the cheek, saying, “How are you, my blessed teacher?”

Can you imagine the pain and heartache Chris felt in that moment? Then again, perhaps you don’t have to imagine because you, too, have felt the sting of violated trust. Perhaps you’ve wondered if you could ever trust anyone ever again?

Here are three steps toward learning to trust again:

Reveal your hurt to God. Vent your frustrations to God. Tell him about the friend who betrayed your most intimate secret, the family member who broke a promise one too many times, or the co-worker who deliberately worked to make you look bad even while she pretended to be supporting you.

God will never be surprised or upset by your anger, your hurt, or your sense of loss over betrayal. You can tell him exactly how you feel, and trust him to understand.

Release those who’ve offended you. Forgiveness does not mean you instantly trust your friend again. God teaches us to forgive instantly and as many times as it takes; however, trust must be rebuilt over time. Trust must be re-earned.

Forgiveness doesn’t mean you have to resume the relationship immediately, and it also doesn’t mean you have to resume it without any change. Your friend, or family member, will only be able to build your trust over time as she consistently and humbly shows that she is “one who lives honestly, practices righteousness, and acknowledges the truth in [her] heart—who does not slander with [her] tongue, who does not harm [her] friend or discredit [her] neighbor . . .” (Psalm 15:2-3 HCSB).

Re-focus your life. Don’t let anyone, particularly someone who has betrayed your trust, control you through a grip on your emotions. No doubt you’re feeling angry and hurt, but rather than trying to resist those thoughts, redirect them.

For instance, try to see the situation from God’s perspective, and remember his ability to take things that are hurtful or mean-spirited in our lives and turn them into good.

And that brings me back to my friend, Chris. He knew, without a doubt, that what his betrayer meant for bad, God could turn into good. You may have already figured out that my friend Chris is actually Jesus, betrayed with a kiss by Judas:

The betrayer had worked out a sign with them: “The one I kiss, that’s the one—seize him.” He went straight to Jesus, greeted him, “How are you, Rabbi?” and kissed him. Jesus said, “Friend, why this charade?” Then they came on him—grabbed him and roughed him up (Matthew 26:48-50 MSG).....Rick Warren

Love Needs No Because

Very rarely will anyone die for a righteous man, though for a good man someone might possibly dare to die.

Romans 5:7 (NIV)

The love of God needs no because. He does not give his love because of something that you’ve done. He does not give his love because of something he will gain. He does not give his love because it’s something you have earned.

He gives his love with no because.

We come at love with conditions: you can take it or leave it.

God comes at love with no conditions: I’ll take you and I won’t leave you.

We might, in rare instances, show love by dying for someone we deem worthy. God, in all instances, showed love by dying for us, even when we were still drawing blood from his love (Romans 5:7–8).

When we were still in rebellion against God’s love, Jesus said, “I lay down my life . . . . No one takes it from me, but I lay it down of my own accord” (John 10:17–18 NIV).

I lay it down, Jesus says, with no need for because.

“I have set you an example that you should do as I have done for you” (John 13:15 NIV)...Jon Walker

True: God’s Love Fills Me

May the grace of the Lord Jesus Christ, and the love of God, and the fellowship of the Holy Spirit be with you all.

2 Corinthians 13:14 (NIV)

In faith, I know these things to be true:

• God is full of love and grace, and he fills me with his love and grace.

• God’s work within me is to clear a channel for his love and grace to flow through me into the lives of anyone and everyone I meet.

• I may not be there yet, but I am “confident of this, that he who began a good work in [me] will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus” (Philippians 1:6 NIV).

• And I know “God is able to make all grace abound [in me], so that in all things at all times, having all that [I] need, [I] will abound in every good work” (2 Corinthians 9:8 NIV).

• He will make my joy complete because I no longer live in darkness, but I now live in the truth and have fellowship with God (1 John 1:4; 1 John 1:6).

• Through the “Lord Jesus Christ, and the love of God, and the fellowship of the Holy Spirit,” I am, at all times, filled with grace, mercy, and peace (2 Corinthians 13:14 NIV).

This is what I believe to be true and I will walk accordingly, allowing God to do his work in me from the inside out. Father, make it so. I believe; help my unbelief....Jon Walker

Until We’re Fully Known

Now we see but a poor reflection as in a mirror; then we shall see face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I am fully known.

1 Corinthians 13:12 (NIV)

In relationships the failure to communicate can be extremely frustrating. But, the failure to commune leads us to despair.

Communication is usually about sharing information – at its most basic level, the transmitting and receiving of meanings.

Communion, however, is about sharing life. It’s about knowing and being known, caring and being cared for on a deep and personal basis.

Perhaps the most pressing need each of us has is to know that we are fully known and yet still deeply loved; that, despite our failures and weaknesses, regardless of our successes and strengths, we are still unconditionally loved.

Some of our families did a fairly good job of this while others failed miserably.

But God, the Father, is perfect in his love, and we are already fully known by him. He created us with a desire for that “fully known” love and so he draws us to himself, where we are face-to-face with him, where one day we will know fully even as we are now fully known (1 Corinthians 13:12 NIV).

And our objective-in-Jesus is to carry this fully known love into our relationships, modeling for others a Christlike communion that emerges in a place where it is safe to be fully known and still be loved.....Jon Walker

Lost on the Sin Trail

You have been set free from sin and have become slaves to righteousness.

Romans 6:18 (NIV)

For years I wandered away from God and my image of that time is that of a traveler on a trail through the wilderness.

I left the trail and got lost.

Wandering in the wilderness, I lost even the memory that I was there because of my own sinful choices. Eventually, I lost the truth that I had any choice at all. It felt like I was held hostage by my choices and that I had no choice but to keep making the same choices. What other choice did I have?

So, part of my prodigal return was realizing I still had a choice, starting with the foundational choice that “I can’t, but God can.”

Once I returned to God’s path, I could clearly see the terrible, horrible choice I’d made to wander away, and the resulting waste of time, energy, and missed opportunities. Not to mention, I’d been exhausting myself trying to live life like it was never designed to be lived.

What I could also see is that I still had choices – I could continue down God’s path, I could sit and mourn the waste, or I could return to my wanderings.

But, most of all, I finally believed my freedom of choice left me free not to sin. I did not have to sin; I could choose not to sin. I am free from sin, not free from temptation, but free from the slavery of sin that kept me chained to ungodly choices.

Jesus broke the power of sin in your life, and he’s empowered you, through the Holy Spirit, to make the right, corrective, godly choices.

Be still and know that he is God – and think upon this truth...Jon Walker

Never Say Amen

Then he returned to his disciples and found them sleeping. “Could you men not keep watch with me for one hour?” he asked Peter.

Matthew 26:40 (NIV)

Help me, Lord, to develop a strong prayer life. I know you desire intimacy with me, and you want me to watch with you and pray (Matthew 26:40).

Yet, I never seem to find the time to pray in a deep, fervent, consistent, persistent way. What draws me to my knees the most is when I have a problem, when I want something from you, when I need your help.

I’m flipping through my calendar, stressing with commitments, and you just want to hang out – with me. Help me turn my prayers into conversations with you that keep flowing throughout the day, an on-going communication where I never say “Amen.”

Keep me close to you, no matter what it takes. I’m not sure I really want to pray that; I have bruises and scars from “whatever it takes” discipleship, but, then again, I confess the crush of these moments have taught me to throw myself on the stone before the stone falls on me.

And that has moved me closer to the love that compels my obedience, closer to becoming one with your heart. So, I’m asking that you change me until my deepest want is to be with you.

With this I pray that you will create me worthy of my calling and that your power will fulfill every good purpose you plan for me and energize everything I do in faith.

My prayer is that your life will emerge in my face and in my hands, in my thoughts and in my words. I know your grace will make it so (paraphrase of 2 Thessalonians 1:11-12, NIV).....Jon Walker

Do Your Best to Rest

There remains, then, a Sabbath-rest for the people of God; for anyone who enters God’s rest also rests from his own work, just as God did from his. Let us, therefore, make every effort to enter that rest.

Hebrews 4:9–11 (NIV)

Most of us think of the Sabbath as a day of rest, originating from the day of rest God took after he created the universe, as recorded in Genesis. That view is correct; it’s the reason we should take a Sabbath, a day of rest, each week.

Yet the Sabbath has a larger sense: an invitation to rest in God’s healing grace, trusting in his power and his purpose for your life. We rest in our Father’s arms, knowing he goes before and behind, knowing that his plans for us are good and not evil (Jeremiah 29:11).

God wants us to focus our efforts toward entering this Sabbath-trust in God, a restful, radiant certainty that God’s got a handle on it all, and that he’s got our best interests in mind.

Ian Thomas illustrates this point by telling the story of a man walking down a dusty, rural road on a hot and humid day. The man is loaded down with a heavy backpack and carries a duffle bag in each hand. A pick-up truck comes along, and the driver lets the man hop in the back.

The driver heads on down the road, but when he looks in the rearview mirror he sees that his passenger is standing in the bed of the truck still holding both duffle bags, still wearing the over-packed backpack on his back.

Truth is: We stand in the truck of faith, still carrying our burdens, thinking they’re independent of our ride with God. We think God can carry us, but not our burdens. But God’s truck of faith is big enough to carry us and to carry all our burdens.

Sit down and rest in the ride of God, our Father, carrying us home to him....Jon Walker

Jesus-Love Is Personal

We are from God, and whoever knows God listens to us; but whoever is not from God does not listen to us. This is how we recognize the Spirit of truth and the spirit of falsehood.

1 John 4:6 (NIV)

My mother gave me a great gift and that is sensitivity about giving gifts. She taught me giving a gift is an opportunity to show you’ve thought about the person, taking time to discover likes and needs.

What this translates into is you don’t use a birthday to give a household item you were going to purchase anyway: “Gee, honey, thanks for the vacuum cleaner.” Or, you don’t give your eighty-year-old aunt a power drill (unless that’s what she really wants!). The fact that there are so many returns after Christmas and so many gift cards purchased (okay, I buy them too) shows we’re not taking the time to make gifts personal.

Here’s the thing: just like gifts, love operates as personal. Jesus came in person. He didn’t come to us as a religion, a set of laws, or merely as an ideal; he came in person. Through his death and resurrection he brings us into the personal embrace of a passionate and loving relationship.

We live in an increasingly impersonal world where “don’t call us until you’ve read through all the frequently asked questions” is the norm, and when we finally do call, we get a recorded voice. We live as if better organization, perfect efficiency, and instant acquisition will somehow deliver us from our meaninglessness and hopelessness.

Yet, Jesus-one, we are from God, the Creator and Protector of all that is personal. Through our personalized expression of love for each other we proclaim: “Do you want to see who the person of God is and how he personally loves us? Watch how we love one another.”....Jon Walker