Choosing to Become Like Jesus

“This will continue until we are . . . mature, just as Christ is, and we will be completely like him” (Ephesians 4:13 CEV).

Spiritual maturity is neither instant nor automatic; it is a gradual, progressive development that will take the rest of your life as God helps you make healing choices.

The Apostle Paul said, “This will continue until we are …mature, just as Christ is, and we will be completely like him” (Ephesians 4:13 CEV).

As you struggle with your hurts, habits, and hang-ups, it is important to remember you are a work in progress. God doesn’t expect you to be perfect; he knows you will make mistakes. The Bible says we won’t be perfectly like Jesus until we’re able to see Jesus perfectly: “We can’t even imagine what we will be like when Christ returns. But we do know that when he comes we will be like him, for we will see him as he really is” (1 John 3:2 NLT).

A simple truth to remember is that God is far more interested in building your character than he is anything else. We worry when God seems silent on a specific issue, but what God cares about most is that whatever you do, you do in a Christlike manner (1 Corinthians 10:31; 1 Corinthians 16:14; Colossians 3:17, 23).

In other words, God is interested in who you are. For instance, he’s much more concerned about your character than your career, because you will take your character into eternity, but not your career.

The Bible warns, “Don’t become so well-adjusted to your culture that you fit into it without even thinking. Instead, fix your attention on God. You’ll be changed from the inside out…Unlike the culture around you, always dragging you down to its level of immaturity, God brings the best out of you, develops well-formed maturity in you” (Romans 12:2 MSG).

Becoming like Jesus means we must make choices that are countercultural. These kinds of healing choices will protect us from other forces trying to mold us into their image.

Jesus did not die on the cross just so we could simply live comfortable, well-adjusted lives. His purpose is far deeper: he wants to make us like himself before he takes us to heaven.

Rick Warren

God’s Spirit Is Working in You

“God is working in you, giving you the desire to obey him and the power to do what pleases him” (Philippians 2:13 NLT).

It is the Holy Spirit’s job to produce Christlike character in you.

The Bible says, “As the Spirit of the Lord works within us, we become more and more like him and reflect his glory even more” (2 Corinthians 3:18 NLT). This process of changing us to be more like Jesus is called sanctification.

You cannot reproduce the character of Jesus on your own strength. New Year’s resolutions, willpower, and best intentions are not enough. Only the Holy Spirit has the power to make the changes God wants to make in our lives: “God is working in you, giving you the desire to obey him and the power to do what pleases him” (Philippians 2:13 NLT).

Mention the “power of the Holy Spirit,” and many people think of miraculous demonstrations and intense emotions. But most of the time the Holy Spirit’s power is released in your life in quiet, unassuming ways. He often nudges us with “a gentle whisper” (1 Kings 19:12 NIV).

Christlikeness is not produced by imitation, but by inhabitation. We choose to allow Christ to live through us. “For this is the secret: Christ lives in you” (Colossians 1:27 NLT).

How is this practical to the way we live life each day? Through the choices we make. We choose to do the right thing in situations and then trust God’s Spirit to give us his power, love, faith, and wisdom to do it. Since God’s Spirit lives inside of us, these things are always available for the asking.

Rick Warren

Healing Choices: God Wants You Strong

“Then Jesus said to him, ‘Get up! Pick up your mat and walk.’ At once the man was cured; he picked up his mat and walked” (John 5:8–9 NIV).

For 38 years the man was paralyzed in a sickly cycle of passive dependency, coping to make it to the end of each day, longing for something else.

It’s the kind of circular survival thinking that traps us in a death-like state where we’re ruled by our fears and our stress, far removed from the abundant life Jesus promised.

Then Jesus said, “Get up! Pick up your mat and walk.”

He gave the man an option: “You can get up and walk, step into faith and leave behind your fear. God is strong, and he wants you strong.”

Like our own steps of faith, the first step was surely the hardest for the man. He had 38 years of experience telling him his legs would not support a walk; he had no experience in trusting this man named Jesus.

It took courage, energy and pain to take the first step, but then, he had one step of experience telling him Jesus might be right; two steps telling him Jesus could be right; three steps telling him Jesus must be right; four steps telling him Jesus is absolutely right.

Jesus didn’t enslave the man; he liberated him, empowering him with choice and independence from his fears.

When we’re paralyzed in confusion and fear, the questions remain:

• Do I want to be healed?
• Will I do whatever God says to be healed?
• Will I pick up my mat and walk, making godly, healing choices?
• Will I step into faith and walk away from my fear?

Pray – ‘Father, I want to be healed. Help me in my unbelief. Be my strength and my boldness. Amen.’

Jon Walker

The Healing Choice to Forgive

“Never pay back evil with more evil . . . Don’t let evil conquer you, but conquer evil by doing good” (Romans 12:17, 21 NLT).

What is your normal reaction when people hurt you intentionally? Retaliate! Get even! We're often at our creative best when we’re thinking up methods to get even.

But the Bible teaches we need to make a choice to forgive. Instead of reacting, we should take the initiative to forgive.

In his book, Why Am I Afraid To Tell You Who I Am?, John Powell says he was walking down the street with a friend and they stopped to get a paper. The man selling the paper was discourteous and very rude. As they walked away, John’s friend said to the man, “You have a nice day, now!”

John asked his friend, “Is that man always that rude to you?”

“Yes.”

“Are you always that nice to him?”

John’s friend said, “Yes, I’m not going to let one man ruin my day.”

The brilliant African-American scientist, Booker T. Washington, faced prejudice all his life, but he made a very significant choice about how he would handle it: “I will never allow another man to control or ruin my life by making me hate him.”

The moment you start retaliating or seeking revenge is the same moment you give up control of your life. You have allowed the person you’re angry at to gain control of your life because you are reacting, which is a position of weakness, as opposed to forgiving, which is a position of Christlike strength.

The Bible teaches, “Dear friends, never take revenge. Leave that to the righteous anger of God. For the Scriptures say, ‘I will take revenge; I will pay them back,’ says the Lord” (Romans 12:19 NLT).

Rick Warren

Healing Choices: Be Teachable, Not Unreachable

“If you accept correction, you will be honored” (Proverbs 13:18 NLT).

Meekness means you have a teachable spirit. Meek people are eager to learn. They know they don't know it all and they don't try to pretend they know it all.

James 1:19 is one of my favorite Bible verses: “Understand this, my dear brothers and sisters: You must all be quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to get angry” (NLT). It tells how to control your temper. In fact, if you do the first two, the third is automatic. When you're quick to listen, and slow to speak, you will be slow to anger.

On the other hand, if we're slow to listen and quick to speak, we'll be quick to anger. We need to listen; use our ears; and be teachable, not unreachable.

When someone makes a constructive suggestion, how do you respond to it? Do you get uptight and defensive? Are you open or closed to new ideas? Are you open to change or closed to change? When we are meek someone can correct us because we're teachable, not unreachable.

A few weeks ago I saw this sign: “I’d rather change my mind and succeed than have my own way and fail.” Proverbs 13:18 says, “If you ignore criticism, you will end in poverty and disgrace; if you accept correction, you will be honored” (NLT). A meek person is not a weak person; rather, a meek person is understanding, not demanding; gentle, not judgmental.
A meek person is someone who has made the healing choice to be teachable.

Rick Warren

Healing Choices: Controlled by Circumstances or Character

“It is better to win control over yourself than over whole cities” (Proverbs 16:32 TEV).

When we say things like, ‘That makes me so mad…so sad…feel so bad,’ then we’re actually saying that circumstances control the way we feel. Yet, we do have a choice. We have the ability to make healing choices. We can choose to remain positive; we can choose to not let some circumstance ‘make’ us mad.

The ability to control our reactions, to handle hurt without retaliating is called meekness. Jesus promised, “Blessed are the meek, for they will inherit the earth” (Matthew 5:5 NIV). Meek people control their reactions toward life and this gives them far more control over a situation than if they simply react.

If you are a meek person, you are no longer a victim. You control your choices. The best definition of meekness in the Bible is Proverbs 16:32: “ . . . It is better to win control over yourself than over whole cities” (TEV).

During World War II, the noted psychiatrist Victor Frankl was a prisoner in the concentration camp at Auschwitz. He said, “They took my clothes, my wife, my kids, my wedding ring. I stood naked before the SS and I realized they can take everything in my life but they cannot take my freedom to choose how I will respond to them."

That is a freedom you will always have. How do I react? How do I choose to react to those people who hurt me?

Jesus says we will be blessed when we show self-control. You might be thinking, ‘That leaves me out! I can't control my reactions! I can't get them under control!’ The secret of controlling your reaction is letting God's Spirit fill your life moment-by-moment. He'll break all those bad habits, all those patterns of reacting, all those old ways of being negative, defensive--reacting in fear, in anger, in sarcasm. He can break all those old patterns in your life and fill your life with power, love, and self-control (2 Timothy 1:7).

Some of us are stressed out by life, by circumstances, by relationships. What do we need more than anything else? We need to develop the quality of meekness; the quality of controlling our reactions by the Spirit God has placed in us.

Rick Warren

Healing Choice: Self-Control is Christ’s Control

“Though one may be overpowered, two can defend themselves. A cord of three strands is not quickly broken” (Ecclesiastes 4:12 NIV).

There’s nothing you can do as well without Christ as you can with him. Any struggle you’re facing will be easier to conquer with his help.

Don’t make the mistake of thinking you have to clean up all your messes before you ask God for help. That’s like curing yourself of a disease before you drive down and see the doctor. Go to God first and get his help in all your battles.

The secret of self-control is Christ’s control. Then, as you face temptations that are too strong for you to resist, remember he is with you and turn them over to him. Remember, Christ provides the power to change your life!

But Jesus will also use two things to help you develop self-control:

Avoid temptation
It is just pure common sense: Don’t put yourself in situations where you’ll face temptation. If you struggle with alcohol, don’t go into a bar. If you’re struggling to lose weight, don’t load the refrigerator with ice cream. Do whatever you must to avoid temptation.

Make yourself accountable
Find someone who will check up on you, pray for you, and encourage you in the areas where you want to develop more self-control. Ecclesiastes 4:12 says, “Though one may be overpowered, two can defend themselves. A cord of three strands is not quickly broken” (NIV).

If you’re serious about self-control, find another believer you trust and say, “I have this problem. I’ve confessed it to God. I’ve asked forgiveness, and now I want to ask you to help me. Will you be my ‘buddy,’ a person I can call on the phone when I need support and encouragement?”

I believe God intends for every church to be filled with “buddy” relationships where people are accountable to each other, where they help and encourage each other in the Lord.

Having someone hold you accountable is tough, but it works.

Rick Warren

Healing Choice: Protecting Your Mind

“We demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ” (2 Corinthians 10:5 NIV).

Your mind is a special gift from God. It can potentially store 100 trillion thoughts. And it is a tool that God wants to use in your ministry to fulfill his purposes.

That’s why we have to be choosy. We have to control what--or who--we allow into our minds. What’s true of computers is true with humans--garbage in, garbage out.

The Bible says there are five things that we are to guard against:

1. We are to guard our minds against false teaching--The Bible encourages us to contend for, “The faith which was once and for all delivered to the saints” (Jude 1:3 NKJ). That means the Gospel message that’s been passed down for 2,000 years. How do you guard your mind against false teachings? Know the truth. If you know the truth, you can instantly spot a lie. Treasury agents are not trained to detect counterfeiting by handling counterfeit bills. They give them real bills and study them so well that when a counterfeit dollar bill is put in their hands, they immediately know that it’s false.

2. We are to guard our minds against temptation--Psalm 101:3 says, “I will not set before my eyes anything that is worthless” (ESV). That’s a good verse to put on your television. When was the last time you actually got up and switched channels because what you were seeing was worthless? When I start to feel tempted, I often say, “Lord, I mentally put on the helmet of salvation that Scripture talks about in Ephesians 6:17.” What does a helmet do? It protects my mind. When I do this, I’m saying, “Lord, I want you to cover my mind with your blood. I will be guarding my mind from temptation.”

3. We are to guard our minds against counterfeit spiritual experiences--Galatians 1:6-8 says even if an angel tells you something different than what the Word of God says, don’t believe him.

4. We are to guard our minds against pride--Pride is the sin that God judges quicker than any other single sin. Aaron got prideful, and God smote him. Uzziah got prideful, and God smote him. Pride is the sin that got Satan kicked out of Heaven. People will tell you things that will puff you up. You have to remain humble and not let pride enter your mind.

5. We are to guard against an overworked mind--We strain our minds too much by overwork. This can cloud our ability to make sound judgments. That’s why we need to have a day of rest every week.

Rick Warren

Healing Choices: A Mind for Repentance

"Let God transform you into a new person by changing the way you think” (Romans 12:2 NLT).

Imagine riding in a speedboat on a lake with an automatic pilot set to go east. If you decide to reverse and head west, you have two possible ways to change the boat’s direction. One way is to grab the steering wheel and physically force it to head in the opposite direction from where the autopilot is programmed to go.

By sheer willpower you could overcome the autopilot, but you would feel constant resistance. Your arms would eventually tire of the stress, you’d let go of the steering wheel, and the boat would instantly head back east, the way it was internally programmed.

This is what happens when you try to change you life with willpower: You say, “I’ll force myself to eat less . . . exercise more . . . quit being disorganized and late.”

Yes, willpower can produce short-term change, but it creates constant internal stress because you haven’t dealt with the root cause. The change doesn’t feel natural, so eventually you give up and quickly revert to your old habits and hang-ups.

There is a better and easier way: Change your autopilot--the way you think. The Bible says, “Let God transform you into a new person by changing the way you think” (Romans 12:2 NLT).

The New Testament calls this mental shift repentance, which in Greek literally means “to change your mind.” You repent whenever you change the way you think by adopting how God thinks--about yourself, sin, God, other people, life, your future, and everything else. You take on Christ’s outlook and perspective.

Rick Warren

Healing Choices: Self-Control is Not an Option

“For the grace of God . . . teaches us to say ‘No’ to ungodliness and worldly passions, and to live self-controlled, upright and godly lives . . . ” (Titus 2:11-13 NIV).

As we discussed yesterday, self-control is not optional for Christians. The race we are running is for eternity, and so we’re to develop a strict discipline (1 Corinthians 9:25).

Here are some other steps to help you gain self control as you make healing choices:

Talk back to your feelings
Do you let your moods manipulate you? God doesn’t want you to be controlled by your feelings. He wants you to master your moods. With Christ as the Master of your life, you can learn to master your feelings.

Talk back to them. Learn to challenge your emotions: “For the grace of God . . . teaches us to say ‘No’ to ungodliness and worldly passions, and to live self-controlled, upright and godly lives . . . ” (Titus 2:11-13 NIV).

God's grace gives us the power to make the right choices--ones that lead to healing. God gives you the ability to say no to that feeling, to that desire, to that impulse.

Believe you can change
The fruit of the Spirit--love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control--grow in your thought life. The seeds must be planted in your mind: The way you think determines the way you feel, and the way you feel determines the way you act.

God gave us the power to change our habits when he gave us the power to choose our thoughts. Does Romans 1:2 tell us to be transformed by working hard at it or by sheer willpower? “Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind” (Romans 12:2 NIV).

What are we to be transformed by--the renewing of the mind. When your self-control is being tested, you need to fill your mind with the promises of God. 1 Corinthians 10:13 says, “God is faithful; he will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted, he will also provide a way out so that you can stand up under it” (NIV).

That’s a fact. If you are a Christian, you can’t honestly say, “The temptation was too strong; I couldn’t help myself.” The Bible says God is faithful. If you’re a Christian, he won’t let you be tempted beyond what you can bear.

He never asks you to bear something that is bigger than the strength he puts inside of you through his Holy Spirit.

Rick Warren

Healing Choices: Developing Self-Control

“Like a city whose walls are broken down is a man who lacks self-control.” (Proverbs 25:28 NIV).

Self-control brings with it the good feeling of competency. Like a finely tuned precision automobile, your life stays on course with the slightest touch of steering. The results of self-control are confidence and an inner sense of security.

Self-control and self-discipline are also key factors in your success as you work through your hurts, habits, and hang-ups. Without self-discipline, you’re less likely to consistently make the kind of choices that will help you heal.

The Apostle Paul realized this when he wrote, “Every athlete in training submits to strict discipline, in order to be crowned with a wreath that will not last; but we do it for one that will last forever” (1 Corinthians 9:25 GNB).

Olympic athletes train for years in order to have a chance to win a brief moment of glory. But the race we are running is far more important than any earthly athletic event. So self-control is not optional for Christians.

How do we gain true self-control?

Admit your problem
The starting point for developing self-control is to face this godly truth: I am responsible for my behavior.

The Bible teaches, “When tempted, no one should say, ‘God is tempting me.’ For God cannot be tempted by evil, nor does he tempt anyone; but each one is tempted when, by his own evil desire, he is dragged away and enticed” (James 1:13-14 NIV).
Do you see what that says? It says you do things because you like to do them! When I do something that I know is bad for me, I still might do it because I like to do it. I want to do it; it’s an inner desire.
Do you want more self-control? Admit you have a problem and be specific about it. Begin praying specifically about your problem areas.
Put your past behind you
In Philippians, we’re taught to forget what is behind and to strain toward what is ahead, to press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called us heavenward in Christ Jesus (based on Philippians 3:13-14 NIV).

This verse exposes a misconception that will keep you from gaining self-control. Many of us think, “Once a failure, always a failure.” But that’s simply not true. God’s mercies--and our second chances--are fresh each morning.

Failure in the past doesn’t mean we will never be able to change as we move forward; however, focusing on past failures does guarantee their repetition. It’s like driving a car and looking in the rearview mirror the whole time. You’re going to collide with what’s ahead of you.

Ask God to help you put your past behind you.

Rick Warren

Healing Choices: Do You Want to be Healed?

"When Jesus saw him lying there and learned that he had been in this condition for a long time, he asked him, ‘Do you want to get well?’” (John 5:6 NIV).


Long ago and far away I was diagnosed with clinical depression and began the hard work of deep, lasting, Jesus-led recovery.

One day Jesus asked me, “Do you want to be healed?”

I was reading in the Apostle John’s book and he was telling about the time that Jesus stopped by the Sheep Gate in ancient Jerusalem. There was a pool there where people waited for a chance to be healed by one of God’s angels, but, as I read, it seemed like Jesus looked over and into my eyes.

“Do you want to be healed?”

It seemed like such a ridiculous question. Of course, I wanted to be healed! But, then, I knew what he meant. Was I willing to make a healing choice?

Was I willing to do the hard work of facing painful situations, uncovering bitterness, and admitting to deep, resentful anger? Was I willing to give up my stubborn excuses that allowed me to stay the same, somehow seeing my sickness as more secure than my health?

Was I willing to give up control, let God be God, and admit that I can’t, but he can; or would I rather insist that I can, even though I can’t, holding myself in a cycle of helplessness and hopelessness?

By the pool at the Sheep Gate, Jesus asked an invalid of thirty-eight years: “Do you want to be healed?” His question swept through the man, swept through 2,000 years, and swept into the shadows of my soul.

“Sir,” the invalid replied, “I have no one to help me . . . ” (John 5:7 NIV).

But there stood the Great Healer holding out help, acutely aware that we can’t, but God can, knowing this to be true because he was on a mission that would provide the only way we can be re-created whole and healthy. Jesus was on the road to Calvary.

The question lingers for you: Do you really want to be healed?

Jon Walker

Healing Choices: Do You Want to be Healed?

When Jesus saw him lying there and learned that he had been in this condition for a long time, he asked him, ‘Do you want to get well?’” (John 5:6 NIV).


Long ago and far away I was diagnosed with clinical depression and began the hard work of deep, lasting, Jesus-led recovery.

One day Jesus asked me, “Do you want to be healed?”

I was reading in the Apostle John’s book and he was telling about the time that Jesus stopped by the Sheep Gate in ancient Jerusalem. There was a pool there where people waited for a chance to be healed by one of God’s angels, but, as I read, it seemed like Jesus looked over and into my eyes.

“Do you want to be healed?”

It seemed like such a ridiculous question. Of course, I wanted to be healed! But, then, I knew what he meant. Was I willing to make a healing choice?

Was I willing to do the hard work of facing painful situations, uncovering bitterness, and admitting to deep, resentful anger? Was I willing to give up my stubborn excuses that allowed me to stay the same, somehow seeing my sickness as more secure than my health?

Was I willing to give up control, let God be God, and admit that I can’t, but he can; or would I rather insist that I can, even though I can’t, holding myself in a cycle of helplessness and hopelessness?

By the pool at the Sheep Gate, Jesus asked an invalid of thirty-eight years: “Do you want to be healed?” His question swept through the man, swept through 2,000 years, and swept into the shadows of my soul.

“Sir,” the invalid replied, “I have no one to help me . . . ” (John 5:7 NIV).

But there stood the Great Healer holding out help, acutely aware that we can’t, but God can, knowing this to be true because he was on a mission that would provide the only way we can be re-created whole and healthy. Jesus was on the road to Calvary.

The question lingers for you: Do you really want to be healed?

Jon Walker

Restoring Relationships: Cooperate

“Do everything possible on your part to live in peace with everybody” (Romans 12:18 TEV).

The sixth biblical step toward restoring a relationship is to cooperate as much as possible.

The Apostle Paul said, "Do everything possible on your part to live in peace with everybody" (Rom. 12:18 TEV). Peace always has a price tag. Sometimes it costs our pride; it often costs our self-centeredness.

For the sake of fellowship, do your best to compromise, adjust to others, and show preference to what they need. A paraphrase of Jesus' seventh beatitude says, "You're blessed when you can show people how to cooperate instead of compete or fight. That's when you discover who you really are, and your place in God’s family."

Peacemaking is not avoiding conflict--running from a problem, pretending it doesn't exist, or being afraid to talk about it is actually cowardice. Jesus, the Prince of Peace, was never afraid of conflict.

Peacemaking is also not appeasement--always giving in, acting like a doormat, and allowing others to always run over you is not what Jesus had in mind. He refused to back down on many issues, standing his ground in the face of evil opposition.

Rick Warren

Restoring Relationships: Fix Problem, Not Blame

“A gentle response defuses anger, but a sharp tongue kindles a temper-fire” (Proverbs 15:1 Msg).

The fifth biblical step toward restoring a relationship is to attack the problem, not the person. You cannot fix the problem if you're consumed with fixing the blame. You must choose between the two. The Bible says, "A gentle response defuses anger, but a sharp tongue kindles a temper-fire" (Prov. 15:1 Msg).

You will never get your point across by being cross, so choose your words wisely. A soft answer is always better than a sarcastic one.

In resolving conflict, how you say it is as important as what you say. If you say it offensively, it will be received defensively. God tells us, "A wise, mature person is known for his understanding. The more pleasant his words, the more persuasive he is" (Prov. 16:21 TEV).

Nagging never works. You are never persuasive when you're abrasive.

During the Cold War, both sides agreed that some weapons were so destructive they should never be used. For the sake of fellowship, you must destroy your arsenal of relational nuclear weapons, including condemning, belittling, comparing, labeling, insulting, condescending, and being sarcastic.

Paul sums it up this way: "Do not use harmful words, but only helpful words, the kind that build up and provide what is needed, so that what you say will do good to those who hear you" (Eph. 4:29 TEV).

Rick Warren

Restoring Relationships: Confess

“First get rid of the log from your own eye; then perhaps you will see well enough to deal with the speck in your friend's eye” (Matthew 7:5 NLT).

The fourth biblical step toward restoring a relationship is to confess your part of the conflict.

If you’re serious about restoring a relationship, you should begin with admitting your own mistakes or sin. Jesus said it's the way to see things more clearly: "First get rid of the log from your own eye; then perhaps you will see well enough to deal with the speck in your friend's eye" (Matt. 7:5 NLT).

Since we all have blind spots, you may need to ask a third party to help you evaluate your own actions before meeting with the person with whom you have a conflict.

Also, ask God to show you how much of the problem is your fault. Ask, "Am I the problem? Am I being unrealistic, insensitive, or too sensitive?" The Bible says, "If we claim that we're free of sin, we’re only fooling ourselves" (1 John 1:8 Msg).

Confession is a powerful tool for reconciliation. Often the way we handle a conflict creates a bigger hurt than the original problem itself. When you begin by humbly admitting your mistakes, it defuses the other person's anger and disarms their attack because they were probably expecting you to be defensive.

Don't make excuses or shift the blame; just honestly own up to any part you have played in the conflict. Accept responsibility for your mistakes and ask for forgiveness.

Rick Warren